So I was in the hospital for 26 hours.
Against my will.
Did you know that hospitals can hold you hostage?
The druggie in trauma room 1 was even more upset than I was. After he got put in restraints, I figured I better just play along.
Seriously though. The hospital has worked something out with the insurance company to ensure that they get to keep patients as long as they want and run up as big of a bill as they possibly can! How do they do it, you ask? Simple. The insurance company refuses to give you a penny for the care you already received if you leave against medical advice. So it didn't matter that I was ready to call it a day and go home after I had an MRI that gave me odds of 999,999 to 1,000,000 of being just fine. I had to stay for the EKG, and the echo-cardiogram, and the ultrasound of my carotid artery. Husband pointed out that if the hospital was really concerned about that 1 in 1,000,000, they really shouldn't be letting us drive home in an automobile.
It's nice to know that I'm a perfectly healthy individual. Peace of mind is priceless. Actually I'll let you know just exactly how much is costs when they send me the bill. No really. If you have an hour of partially blurred vision followed by dizziness and an episode of not being able to remember your husband's name, you should probably go to the ER. You wouldn't want those brief symptoms to become your everyday life. And as the ER doctor said while trying to convince us to stay for more tests, "Do it for your baby. You could become a vegetable! Or die!" Your scare tactics don't work on us, doc. We gotz brains. But get our insurance company involved and we'll do anything you say! :p
Aside from the hostage part and the laying in bed all day letting the few muscles I still have melt away, it was kind of an enjoyable little getaway. Steven and I got to snuggle in a smaller-than-twin-size bed - once we got a bed, that is. Before that we got to watch Greys Anatomy LIVE. It was thrilling, let me tell you. If you have to go to the ER, go when they don't have enough rooms so you'll be put in the hallway for 8 hours outside the trauma rooms. I even got to help re-unite a precious old man with his wife who was brought in on a stretcher and whisked away to room 5 before anybody could update either the computer system or the husband. They give you cool bracelets, freshly warmed blankets, lots of wheelchair and/or wheel-bed rides, and let you order food all day long. We got through lots of crossword and logic puzzles, did a good bit of reading, took a lot of little naps, and eavesdropped on the neighboring patients and nurses. At one point we were considering Christmas caroling through the hallway, but we weren't quite brave enough for that.
At the end of the day, the neurologist said he wasn't sure what happened to me. He speculated that it might have been a silent migrane. My OB thought it could even have been an abnormal dip in blood sugar. That was an expensive and time-consuming confirmation of my initial guess. But on the off chance that it had been a mini-stroke, I guess it was better safe than sorry.
Against my will.
Did you know that hospitals can hold you hostage?
The druggie in trauma room 1 was even more upset than I was. After he got put in restraints, I figured I better just play along.
Seriously though. The hospital has worked something out with the insurance company to ensure that they get to keep patients as long as they want and run up as big of a bill as they possibly can! How do they do it, you ask? Simple. The insurance company refuses to give you a penny for the care you already received if you leave against medical advice. So it didn't matter that I was ready to call it a day and go home after I had an MRI that gave me odds of 999,999 to 1,000,000 of being just fine. I had to stay for the EKG, and the echo-cardiogram, and the ultrasound of my carotid artery. Husband pointed out that if the hospital was really concerned about that 1 in 1,000,000, they really shouldn't be letting us drive home in an automobile.
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| Fall risk?! come on people...i know i'm clumsy, but it's not that bad! |
Aside from the hostage part and the laying in bed all day letting the few muscles I still have melt away, it was kind of an enjoyable little getaway. Steven and I got to snuggle in a smaller-than-twin-size bed - once we got a bed, that is. Before that we got to watch Greys Anatomy LIVE. It was thrilling, let me tell you. If you have to go to the ER, go when they don't have enough rooms so you'll be put in the hallway for 8 hours outside the trauma rooms. I even got to help re-unite a precious old man with his wife who was brought in on a stretcher and whisked away to room 5 before anybody could update either the computer system or the husband. They give you cool bracelets, freshly warmed blankets, lots of wheelchair and/or wheel-bed rides, and let you order food all day long. We got through lots of crossword and logic puzzles, did a good bit of reading, took a lot of little naps, and eavesdropped on the neighboring patients and nurses. At one point we were considering Christmas caroling through the hallway, but we weren't quite brave enough for that.
At the end of the day, the neurologist said he wasn't sure what happened to me. He speculated that it might have been a silent migrane. My OB thought it could even have been an abnormal dip in blood sugar. That was an expensive and time-consuming confirmation of my initial guess. But on the off chance that it had been a mini-stroke, I guess it was better safe than sorry.
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