loneliness.

I fully expect loneliness to be a big problem during the first few weeks of my time studying abroad in Chile. I've heard from many other people who have had a study abroad experience that they cried the first month or so but wouldn't change the experience for anything. I'm trying to wrap my head around how it will feel to not understand nor be understood. How will I handle the pressure of succeeding academically with the desire to get to know the culture and learn the language. Will I be brave enough to practice speaking to my host family and completely embarrass myself? I hope so. I know this is necessary to learn. I pray that I do not waste my time there. If I don't come back fluent, I will be very VERY disappointed. I am excited and scared about being forced to rely on God. I am also excited to know God in Spanish as well as in English. It is so strange to me to think about who the Spanish Rachel will be. I won't know how to joke with the language or express myself the way I want to. After getting over the loneliness I anticipated feeling frustrated with my inability to be who I am inside (Mulan, anyone?). But God is Spanish and English and every language. He knows what's in my heart and mind, not just what I am able to speak out my mouth. Thank you, God!