How do I handle my emotions?
ignore them.
I prefer to be logical and realistic.
I haven't had to deal with stereotypical female mood swings - even in pregnancy. So I didn't think the "Baby Blues" would effect me either. And they haven't, really. I don't feel sad...but I have had a 5 minute teary time every day since the baby was born.
How could I not? A new parent experiences so many strong emotions all at once, all day long.
- Complete awe and overflowing love for this tiny human
- Huge responsibility for keeping this itty bitty life thriving
- Doubt and confidence in my ability to care for her
- Stress over decisions I'm now responsible for but don't feel qualified to make (does she need a Hepatitis B vaccine?!? Is our wood stove-heated air too dry for her??!)
- Joy every time she moves or makes a sound
- Tiredness. Goodbye, solid 9 hours of sleep each night. See you in another 30 years...
- Frustration over lack of ability to plan or control anything
- Uncertainty over what our new life is going to look like
- Sadness over the loss of the life we had just the two of us
Of course I'm going to cry when the electricity comes back on (after only 30 seconds). I was sure we'd lost power for days. This wouldn't have been a problem before the baby...but now it's impossible to survive! Thank you, God, we didn't have to.
Of course I'm going to cry when I make a judgmental comment to my husband who missed one small thing after seriously waiting on me hand and foot for days. How could I be so rude and unloving?
Of course I'm going to cry when I'm staring into the wide-awake, baby-blue eyes and singing songs to her in the middle of the night that my mom sang to me.
Of course I'm going to cry when my husband comes to me for a hug and a chat about how we're doing so far. Or when he texts me to let me know his progress at work. Or when he shares his perspective on why he doesn't miss life just the two of us because life with 3 has already brought us so much closer together. Little extra loves are overwhelming when you're giving everything you've got to your tiny human.
So no, I'm not depressed. No, I don't sit here and cry all day. Yes, I get overwhelmed (and usually feel 10 times better after a good nap).
ignore them.
I prefer to be logical and realistic.
I haven't had to deal with stereotypical female mood swings - even in pregnancy. So I didn't think the "Baby Blues" would effect me either. And they haven't, really. I don't feel sad...but I have had a 5 minute teary time every day since the baby was born.
How could I not? A new parent experiences so many strong emotions all at once, all day long.
- Complete awe and overflowing love for this tiny human
- Huge responsibility for keeping this itty bitty life thriving
- Doubt and confidence in my ability to care for her
- Stress over decisions I'm now responsible for but don't feel qualified to make (does she need a Hepatitis B vaccine?!? Is our wood stove-heated air too dry for her??!)
- Joy every time she moves or makes a sound
- Tiredness. Goodbye, solid 9 hours of sleep each night. See you in another 30 years...
- Frustration over lack of ability to plan or control anything
- Uncertainty over what our new life is going to look like
- Sadness over the loss of the life we had just the two of us
Of course I'm going to cry when the electricity comes back on (after only 30 seconds). I was sure we'd lost power for days. This wouldn't have been a problem before the baby...but now it's impossible to survive! Thank you, God, we didn't have to.
Of course I'm going to cry when I make a judgmental comment to my husband who missed one small thing after seriously waiting on me hand and foot for days. How could I be so rude and unloving?
Of course I'm going to cry when I'm staring into the wide-awake, baby-blue eyes and singing songs to her in the middle of the night that my mom sang to me.
Of course I'm going to cry when my husband comes to me for a hug and a chat about how we're doing so far. Or when he texts me to let me know his progress at work. Or when he shares his perspective on why he doesn't miss life just the two of us because life with 3 has already brought us so much closer together. Little extra loves are overwhelming when you're giving everything you've got to your tiny human.
So no, I'm not depressed. No, I don't sit here and cry all day. Yes, I get overwhelmed (and usually feel 10 times better after a good nap).
So it's about two weeks late - but just wanted to let you know you're being lifted up in prayer :)
ReplyDelete